Thursday, September 27, 2018

Preparation

Is there any place I can sit down, watch the stars counting them and all the blessings ive got? Well, if there is any I would instantly go there, cz I just feel like it.. it's a bit muddled up here...

I'm okay. It's just that, I dunno why but the feeling is like im short of time..I dont have much time left, it's like watching the sand sipping through an hourglass... I don't have much..

Im short of breathe, with lots to say... ive got tons to do but all I did was daydreaming..

I think I should write a bucket list before I kick the bucket.. yeah

Ive got worksss to dooo

Wednesday, September 26, 2018

Im sick

Prophet Muhammad pbuh said we should  not take for granted 5 things in life...

Those...
1. Sihat sebelum sakit
2. Muda sebelum tua
3. Kaya sebelum miskin
4. Lapang sebelum sempit
5. Hidup sebelum mati

From all those 5, sadly, I've been a terrible person cz I've been taking for granted all those former and not been a good follower of what Prophet Muhammad had mentioned...

What the doctor said threw me hard on the ground, I was sad, but all those people next to me said there's nothing big to be sad for.. im kinda disappointed because it wasn't easy to live life when u know u are sick. Really..

So currently im sick of myself..

Im trying to lift up the mood a bit.. but it was hard.. especially when u dont want those u love know that u are sick... so im keeping things to myself now.. I'm writing to keep notes of the journey maybe... one day when I'm gone, someone will have something to read of me, about me.. as a sweet memory of Nani...

And... yeah

I'm a degil person or so they said.. but above all, alhamdulillah, a new parcel from Him as a gift for me to cherish. Thank you.

Wednesday, September 19, 2018

Clingy

Well, I'm starting to be a clingy girl. I know it wont be necessary but I dunnow why on earth suddenly this feeling emerges.

"Them" saying that the engaged couples need to strive hard for the sake of sustaining the relationship is indeed true.

I find it hard.. really...

Tuesday, September 11, 2018

E day

Well, wasnt really ready for what is supposed to be ready but im thankful.

It was a hard decision made. The ceremony was held on Sunday but the final decision was made only on Friday. Phew...

Everything went well, but I really was nervous that I almost had my heart beating out of its normal rhythm.

Above all, I hope I can retain this feeling although it is soooo confusing.. soo sudden and sooo new to me...

Tuesday, October 17, 2017

Gula Melaka

Terkadang dalam rindu yang menyapa lembut...ada hati yang tersentuh

Kisah ini serupa dengan kisah mereka yang menangisi masa lalu kenangan dengan yang sudah tiada..

Dulu..bila ibu nak buat buah melaka, aku la tukang kerat gulanya.bila dah kukerat, datangla si tangan panjang sambar beberapa potong.

Pernah dipesannya kepada ibu mintak dibelikan gula melaka hanya untuk dimakan sebagai snek.. minat betul dia..

Kini,semuanya tinggal kenangan..tiada lagi tangan panjang mengambil gula yang kupotong, tiada siapa lagi ingin kumarah... dan tiada lagi kawan berebut buah melaka. Semuanya tinggal kenangan....

Tuesday, July 25, 2017

I got u

Alhamdulillah, dah dpt smula tab yang sudah lama kutinggalkan.
Gayanya seperti kekok pula menulis dengan keypad yang besar dan skrin yg lebar,

Namun demikian, interface yang ada sudah cukup buat hati ini menangis semula. Kerana hanya dia yang tahu bagaimana menbuat tema yang ada seperti sekarang.

Maka aku harap, ia akan elok sampailah bila2.

Tuesday, July 11, 2017

Just go

I guess Allah is just testing me with another test to see whether I really pass the previous one or not...

And for this time around,I give up.

I never ever been such a disgrace to myself begging for a second chance, I did this time around because I know the feeling of being a left out person, I know the tense of having to keep everything to just yourself.. I just wanted to help.. 

But I failed because of the reason I can't even help it. I can't help the fact that I can't change my history, what and how I led my previous timeline. I just cant do anything with that...

So I guess this is it, stopped disgracing myself, I put a distance and I move on. This time around, whoever is meant to stay just stay, and whoever just happened to be crossing the my timeline will just pass and be gone. I won't ask them to stay. That's the game.

So, I bid farewell to you,I hope you are happy as I am trying really hard here to even cherish my own life..